If you like pina coladas...

I knew it had been a while since my last post, and it had been another while since my post before that, and well, I'm busy and really really lousy at time management. I wouldn't even have a post today except for Facebook. So those of you who are my FB friends may have already seen this, but it's all I've got.

I heard the song "Escape" yesterday. You know, the one also known as "The Pina Colada Song." I am too lazy to go find an n with the little tilde thing on top. Anyway, it made me wonder, and I posted this as my status:

In "The Pina Colada Song," do you think after they got over their amusement at the coincidence, they got pissed?

This generated the most comments on a status that I think I've ever gotten. Anyway, an old friend of mine has an unusual amount of ire toward this song and the man and woman in it. He got quite worked up, so I decided to write a few follow-up verses to the song to try to ease his mind. Here they are:

We left the bar to head home then; we had driven two cars.
I got to thinking about it, driving under the stars.
Hold on just a second; turns out I have half-a-brain.
My lady tried to cheat; my calm was hard to maintain.

'Cause she likes Pina Coladas, and placing personal ads.
She was trying to escape me, feels like a kick in the 'nads.*
She'd rather make love with someone else; in the dunes of the cape.
Now I'll make plans for her and then plan my escape.

I confronted her later about the personal ad.
She said since I answered, that I was just as bad.
And while that may be true, 'twas she who tried to stray first.
So I poisoned her champagne, then I sang her this verse:

"Don't care for Pina Coladas; you see, I much prefer scotch.
Making love in the cape dunes just gets sand in my crotch.
I might get more into health food; and try to extend my life.
So that after I kill you, there's time to find a new wife."

Turns out she was mad also, and she had poisoned my scotch.
She said, "Your time's running out now," and she looked at her watch.
So we both lay there dying; there was not much to say.
Health food would not help us; we wouldn't see the next day.

"So if you like Pina Coladas, I suggest telling your mate.
Go make love in the sand dunes, before it's too late.
Eat some cake and drink champagne and don't be an ass
So your loved one won't some day poison the drink in your glass."

*That one was a stretch, I couldn't find many usable rhymes with "ads"

Easter chicks from hell

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store to pick up some coconut to make these. As I walked into the baking supplies aisle, I glanced to my right and saw these:



Wait. Take a closer look...



Little devil chicks. I just HAD to buy them. I'm pretty sure those devil horns are actually supposed to be wings, but COME ON... they SO do not look like wings. They look like devil horns. OR... maybe they actually ARE devil horns, and these particular chicks were made to add a whimsical touch to a platter of deviled eggs. It's possible. Anyway, I'm thinking of using them like some of you use your Mr. Pickleses^** (would that be the correct plural of Mr. Pickles?). I don't, however, wish to take them all along with me each time I go somewhere that I want to take a devil chick. So I will have to give them each a unique name:

Satan


Lucifer


Beelzebub


His Heinous Highness


Duchess of Devilishness


and

Sultan of Sin


Now I just have to decide which to take where, when. They're all just so devilishly adorable.



** After searching Swistle's site for Mr. Pickles for the link in this post, it appears that Mr. Pickles and the devil chicks are closely related. For some reason I had assumed Mr. Pickles was a sturdier variety of craft-chick. So perhaps the devil chicks' names should be Satan Pickles, Lucifer Pickles, Beelzebub Pickles, His Heinous Highness Pickles, Duchess of Devilishness Pickles and Sultan of Sin Pickles. Swistle, if you read this post, does Mr. Pickles have wings or devil horns?

Playing with perspective

[I am reposting this from my old blog. It was originally posted in May. While I retained the original posting date for most of my transferred posts, I decided to let this one be current. I really like it and wanted to share with the many new readers I have since my move. Oh, and no photoshopping was involved, other than cropping.]







What did YOU do this weekend?